If you encounter difficulties when looking for a job, I guarantee that it is because you are trying to integrate yourself into a company that does not belong to you.
My most common advice to job seekers is: “Look for your shortcomings!”
A few years ago, my wife worked in a printing company. A colleague described his weekend party. The people present felt strange. He didn’t stay long. Then he said, “I always go where I am congratulated, not just where I am tolerated.”
I believe that most of our spiritual pain, frustration, unhappiness and failure originate from trying to “integrate”
We are eager to hear.
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“We want you.”
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“Please join us”
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“We like you.”
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“You are the person we need.”
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“We love you.”
Find the employer who is most likely to accept you, and you will feel that you belong there, which will speed up your job search; you can even hear what is mentioned above.
Finding what you belong to is the best compass that job seekers can use. Don’t look for a job. Instead, find a place that you can accept. Think about it: “I’m not looking for a job; i’m looking for my tribe!”
Suppose you join an organization, such as a regional theater, a professional organization, a church, a car club, a football team, etc. You can feel that you are one of them. As a member of a group of people, they share your values and interests and welcome you to join their circle. When they say “we” also refer to you, it is a good feeling.
To join a company is to join a group.
Work takes up a lot of your time. It is meaningful to let the workplace accept individualism, age, gender, values and beliefs. Because this is not always trying to belong, but can become their own place.
From personal experience, the extra psychological burden of trying to “adapt” will lead to anxiety at work, frustration and anger at home, and sleep difficulties. Does that sound familiar? This is not my job, but my efforts to create my own atmosphere and conditions led to this spiritual pain. During my working time, my internal dialogue is centered on trying to convince myself. My experience is typical of all employees. After all, I don’t go to work for fun. I am for work.
Finally, I began to realize that my method was not suitable for me. So I asked myself: What do I want to be accepted for?(Age, gender, affiliation, values, beliefs, skills). Answering this question requires self reflection.
If you want to work more for the female boss, let’s go. If you want to be surrounded by millennials, you need their energy, go ahead. If you get along better with political conservatives, who has the right to judge you? Would it be more comfortable to face people with different cultural backgrounds?
The difference between feeling that you are the only weird person performing in the circus and feeling the heartbeat sitting where you have to go is the people around you.
Looking for a job can bring great benefits. There is no need to spend energy to adapt. You’re not looking for a job just to get a steady salary.
Suitability is the core of each recruitment process. When you enter the formal interview stage, it is because you are qualified for the job. Otherwise, you will not be interviewed. The hiring manager is interviewing you to determine your suitability. Because it is suitable, it is a two-way distance, so use discussion to judge whether you are suitable. At the end of the day, only you know you and what suits you.
Looking for your tribe is ultimately about understanding those who are honest with themselves and support your soul, dialogue, relationships and social interaction. So where will you do the best?
When leaving, whether you are in the early or late stages of your work, unsuitable is the most important reason for employees to be dismissed. Don’t underestimate the correlation between health and working life.
